Dancing at Daybreak Read online

“Chamomile, please.” Whatever nettle was. Dixie didn’t want to know.

  Fran poured a coffee and dribbled some cream in it while the kettle heated.

  Dixie sat at the kitchen table and lifted Henry to her lap. He slapped at the table and grinned up at her. Her heart caught at how much he looked like his daddy. Why couldn’t things be simpler with Dan? Why had she finally latched onto a decent guy only to lose him to religion?

  The doorbell rang, but Fran didn’t take two steps toward it before the door popped open and a young woman about Dixie’s age entered carrying a toddler.

  Henry squirmed to get down. “Baba.”

  “Hey, Henry. Yes, I brought the baby. Not that Gavin is so much younger than you are.” The woman plopped the small boy on the floor then flipped back her long dark hair as she looked at Dixie. “I’m Ava, by the way. You must be Henry’s mom.”

  “Yes. Dixie Wayling. Nice to meet you.” It seemed like Fran’s daycare was a happening place. The few times Dixie had been by before, she’d turned down the invitation. Probably a good idea to see where her sons spent so much time, though.

  The kettle whistled. “Time for coffee or tea, Ava?” asked Fran. “Or do you have classes today?”

  Ava grimaced. “Today and every day. Dafne will be here to pick up Gavin after three.”

  “Sounds good. One of these days you need to come by when you have more than five seconds. Seems like ages since we’ve caught up.”

  “I know. I’ll try. Promise.” She patted the little guy on the head. “Bye, Gav. Nice to meet you, Dixie. Have a good day, Fran.” Fluttering her fingers, she dashed out the door.

  “Always so busy with classes.” Fran poured boiling water over herbs, and the rich aroma of chamomile permeated the space. “Did you go to college, Dixie?”

  “No. I wasn’t much for school.” She’d made it through high school by the skin of her teeth, and that was enough. Just lately she’d begun to regret not having any goals for her life, though. Not quite twenty-five with three kids. Ugh.

  “Having a family childcare home wasn’t what I always wanted, either.” Fran’s eyes grew large. “Not that I don’t enjoy having your boys and little Gavin and a few other drop-ins. I do have a degree in early childhood, but I wanted to stay home with Tieri and Luca, and we couldn’t quite afford it on Tad’s income with the city. Tad’s my husband.”

  Of course, Fran was married. Dixie and Dan’s old apartment complex was full of fluid families with partners coming and going. She and Dan had practically been the longest standing couple in the place by the time they left. Moving to a rental house in an established neighborhood had only reminded Dixie that some people lived a different normal.

  She accepted the cup of tea and the jar filled with honey, even as the urge to grab the boys and run swelled over her. But she still hadn’t seen Buddy, and Henry had just offered a stuffed giraffe to Gavin then snatched it away while the other boy stared, thumb in mouth. Besides, she really was kind of starving for female companionship. Days home alone with the kids dragged on. “Thanks.”

  Fran set a plate of cookies on the table then bent and offered one to each of the toddlers before taking a seat at the table. She smiled at Dixie. “Tell me all about yourself.”

  Um, no. That wasn’t happening.

  “Did you grow up in Spokane?”

  “Yeah, but not in as nice a neighborhood as this.” Her kids really were lucky to have Dan in their lives. Too bad she couldn’t say the same for herself.

  “Siblings?” Fran took a sip.

  Dixie shook her head. “Nope, just me and my mom.” And a revolving door of men.

  “I’ve got one younger brother. Rob lives in Montana with his wife and three kids.” Fran glanced at Dixie. “His wife had two already when they met. She’d had a rough upbringing and all, but she and Rob are so happy together now. They had a baby boy last Christmas.”

  “How nice for them.” Whatever rough upbringing meant. Could it match Dixie’s mess? Not likely. Some days it felt like she’d cornered the market.

  Fran’s warm smile probed the crust of Dixie’s shell. “It really is. I know Bren had a hard time believing in her worth. In Rob’s love for her.” She chuckled. “In God’s love, too.”

  And here came the God-talk that seemed so prevalent in Bridgeview. Great. “God’s never done anything for me.”

  “Oh, but He has. He created you. He loves you. He offers hope for the future filled with His joy.”

  Dixie shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Now you sound like Dan, but I’m here to tell you God doesn’t give joy. He kills it.”

  Fran reached out a hand but stopped just before covering Dixie’s. “Oh, no, honey. I’m so sorry you feel that way. If you turn toward Him instead of away, you’ll find the opposite is true. He’ll welcome you and shower you with peace and comfort.”

  “That’s great for you.” Dixie surged to her feet. “I really need to be going now. Where did you say Buddy is?” She plucked Henry off the floor and swung him to her hip.

  “Aw, I wasn’t trying to push you. I just get so excited about Jesus. Please stay and finish your tea. I promise to tone it down.”

  No way. Dixie was out of here.

  Henry on his hip, Dan watched as Dixie peeled out of the driveway, tires spinning in the gravel. Not only had she been late this morning — meaning she’d had to pick the boys up from Fran’s — but she wouldn’t even meet his gaze when he got home. He’d walked in, and she’d jumped off the sofa, grabbed her purse, and all but jogged for the door. No flirting. No accusations. No nothing.

  He heaved a deep sigh. What was going on with her? And was it ever going to end? He’d been so hopeful a few months ago.

  “Hey, neighbor.”

  Dan swung toward the house next door, where Jacob Riehl came through the side gate, locking a bleating goat in the backyard. “Hey.”

  “Don’t see you around much. How are things going?”

  “Could be better.” No doubt his neighbor had heard Dixie’s dramatic exit. “But I’m keeping busy, wrapping up the season. You?”

  Jacob shoved his hands into trouser pockets. “Yeah, and I’m leaving for Africa for two weeks on Friday. Sure wish I could take Eden on one of these trips.”

  “You work for a solar company, don’t you?”

  “Yep. Global Sunbeams. We do a lot of charity work in Mozambique, Malawi, and other countries in that part of eastern Africa. Cyclones destroyed some of our installations, so a team of us are headed over for repairs.”

  “That’s cool.” Dan grimaced. “You’re doing something that really makes a difference, and I’m mowing rich peoples’ yards. Something anyone could do.”

  “Don’t knock it, Ranta. We all have our own part to play, you know? A guy with three little kids to take care of can’t be off jaunting around the world for weeks at a time. They need you.”

  It probably wasn’t the time to ask if Jacob and his wife were planning to start a family. Not while Dan had done everything backward, a point even his anti-Christian father hammered home every chance he got.

  Jacob leaned closer, his mouth twisted into a half-smile. “Mind you, Eden’s not happy my work takes me away so often. She gets it, but still.”

  “Dixie wouldn’t put up with it, that’s for sure.” Dan shook his head. “Not that she puts up with me, exactly, anyway.” Good thing his son was too young to understand the conversation.

  “She sounded a little upset when she left.”

  “She was.” Dan eyed his neighbor. They must be close in age. Just look what a difference an education, a longstanding faith, and a wealthy family could make — not that Jacob and Eden lived like they had money. Eden worked for the city in animal control, a job Dan wouldn’t want for anything.

  “Some of the guys from church just started getting together Wednesday mornings to pray with one another. Interested in joining us?”

  Dan shook his head. “Full slate on Wednesdays.” And every day. Work would be spottier ov
er the winter, depending on how much it snowed.

  Jacob grinned. “It’s at six in the morning.”

  “Doesn’t much help since I have to be here with the kids until Dixie arrives.” Or until she didn’t, as the case might be. Half her problem tonight was that he’d taken the boys to Fran’s this morning, but how was he supposed to know she was on her way if she didn’t call? Kindergarten for Mandy started at eight-fifteen and Dan’s first client expected him at eight-thirty clear over in Greenwood. Dixie knew he couldn’t sit around waiting for her to show up whenever she got around to it. He had a business to run.

  “Eden and I talked about that. She offered to pop over here for that hour. Some of the guys have to start work at seven-thirty or eight, so we’re punctual about ending at seven. Eden doesn’t start until nine, so she’d still have plenty of time to get ready for work if she was here with the kids.”

  Dan stared at his neighbor and shifted Henry to his other hip. “Seriously? She doesn’t even really know us. That’s thoughtful and all, but I can’t ask for charity.”

  “You’re not asking. She’s offering. She’s tried to get to know Dixie a little but hasn’t gotten very far.”

  Dan heaved a sigh. “Dixie is... wary. To her way of thinking, everyone in the neighborhood judges her and talks about her behind her back.”

  “I’m sorry she feels that way, man. I think Eden’s not the only woman who’s tried to extend some friendship. We all just want to surround your family with love and support.” Jacob grinned. “And I think the men’s prayer breakfast would help you see that.”

  Something eased inside Dan. “You didn’t say anything about breakfast before. That changes everything.”

  “We meet at Bridgeview Bakery and Bistro. Hailey opens up an hour early for us on Wednesdays. It won’t be full service since the staff has their usual prep to do, but she’ll offer coffee and a set breakfast each week for a good price. I usually walk over. It’s just a few blocks.”

  “Are you sure Eden wouldn’t mind?”

  “Positive. It was her idea. She asked me to mention it to you if I saw you.”

  “You know what? Let’s give it a try. But you’re off to Africa.”

  Jacob shrugged. “Not until Friday, so we can go together this week. Besides, you know everyone. You went to school with half of them, didn’t you?”

  “Yeah, I guess I did. The Santoro guys and Nathan Hamelin, anyway.”

  “Like I said, half.” The other man grinned. “Just want you to know that we’re all here for you. We already pray for both you and Dixie. I’m confident God will answer our prayers on your behalf.” He chucked Henry under the chin. “This little guy will grow up in a Christian home with two parents.”

  Henry chortled.

  “Wish I was as sure as you.” Dan mussed his son’s hair. “But it seems farther away than ever before.”

  3

  Too bad they weren’t a real family. At times like this, it would be far too easy for Dixie to let her guard down and pretend, or even go along with Dan’s preposterous offers of marriage and permanence.

  If only permanence were a thing, but it wasn’t. Look at Mom, after all. And, while Dan’s parents had stuck together, Dixie would never put up with Dave Senior the way Yvonne did. Talk about domineering. Even his heart attack and semi-retirement two years before had done little to soothe his bluster.

  Dixie shuddered.

  “Cold?” Dan leaned closer where he sat at the picnic table, the brush of his arm sparking off her shoulder. “I’ve got a spare jacket in the trunk.”

  She blinked the scene back into focus. Fran and Tad Amato sat across from them, Tad laughing at something Fran said, his eyes soft as he looked at her. The four older kids — Tieri, Mandy, Buddy, and Luca — ran and climbed and swung on the nearby play structure while Henry dug in the sand with a stick he’d found.

  “No, I’m good.” She shifted slightly away from Dan so he wouldn’t get any ideas. This was only for Buddy’s birthday, after all. Dan shouldn’t harbor thoughts they were going to hang out on a regular basis. Even when they’d lived together, they’d never done family-type stuff with others. It’d mostly been parties when the kids were asleep.

  Buddy whooshed down the slide and collided with Henry, sending the toddler sprawled in the sand, screaming.

  Before Dixie could get to her feet, Dan was halfway there. He squatted and gave Buddy what-for even while scooping Henry against his shoulder. Henry’s pudgy hands cradled Dan’s neck. Then Buddy patted Henry’s back and wrapped his arms around Dan, too.

  Man, he was so good with the kids. Her heart squeezed. He didn’t seem to remember that Mandy and Buddy weren’t even his.

  “Do you have any drama experience?”

  Dixie blinked at Fran. Where had that question come from? Did the other woman think Dixie was some kind of diva?

  Fran laughed. “Music? Dance? Anything?”

  “I... what are you getting at?” Because Dixie hadn’t been born yesterday. Divulging too much too soon could get her locked into something she wanted no part of.

  “The church puts on a Christmas program every year. Somehow, I’m in charge of it, and it’s really not my area of expertise. That and it takes more than one person to pull it together.”

  Dixie shook her head. “I don’t do church.”

  “I know, but you’re good with the kids, and if you have any experience...?”

  Not experience that counted. “I don’t think so.”

  “The girls have already been practicing their choreography for it.” Fran glanced toward the play structure. “Mandy is a natural.”

  Dan slid back onto the bench, still holding Henry. “Mandy wanted dance lessons, but she told us too late. Classes were already full, so she’s on the cancelation list for January.” He nudged Dixie. “Dixie’s got great moves.”

  Heat swarmed up her face. What would his churchy friends think of that comment?

  “We’re practicing in the church basement Tuesdays after school. You could bring the boys. Luca will be with me — there’s a playroom right off the meeting room.”

  A church basement was still church, right?

  “Kass is in charge most years,” Fran went on. “Have you met her? She and her cousin own Bridgeview Bakery and Bistro. But Kass and Wesley got married in September and, believe it or not, she’s puking pregnant already.”

  “We haven’t really met.” Dan had gone to the wedding, and Dixie had watched the kids. Weddings were not for her, especially when she didn’t know the couple and didn’t want to know them. Weddings gave Dan ideas. He’d been to a few in the past couple of years. She’d seen the aftermath.

  “Adriana is usually big into the planning, too. Her and Rebekah. But they both have newborns. Bridgeview is having a baby boom, and that’s great. But it’s sure hard to find dependable volunteers these days.”

  No one had called Dixie dependable since ever. And Fran knew better, too, what with all the times Dixie flaked out and Dan dropped the boys off at daycare. Yet, Fran was still asking. She was right about one thing. Dixie was bored stiff. Would a regular outing with the kids be so bad?

  Church. It was a church thing. That’s what would be so bad. She shook her head. “I don’t think so.”

  “Aw, I was hoping you’d give it some thought.”

  Dan’s arm pressed against Dixie’s on the picnic table. “You know what might work, Fran? Dixie probably wouldn’t mind if you dropped Luca off at the house when you go over to the church. Then you wouldn’t have to worry about him interrupting you and stuff.”

  The other woman’s face lit up. “That would be a help, for sure. I mean, an assistant would be better, but the boys do play so well together.”

  Dixie knew when she was cornered. “Sure. That’d be fine.”

  “That’s settled, then. Ava might be able to juggle her schedule and help with the choreography. She’s taking dance, you know.”

  No, Dixie didn’t know. “But she has a baby,
too.”

  “Gavin? He’s her nephew.”

  Dixie blinked. She’d seen Ava a few times dropping the little guy off at Fran’s over the past few weeks.

  “Gavin is her sister Dafne’s boy. Daf got pregnant in her Junior year of high school, and her family is helping her raise him. My aunt cut back her hours at work...”

  Fran prattled on, but Dixie tuned her out. A member of the exalted Santoro clan had a baby even younger than Dixie’d been at Mandy’s conception? Although, she knew the family wasn’t completely comprised of paragons. She’d hung out with Fran’s cousin Basil, after all. It had been after Henry’s birth, and she’d been so tired of being a mother and of Dan’s constant hovering, she’d made a play for Basil. She’d pretty much caught him, too, but then he’d tried to run a police checkpoint with her in the car and gotten nailed with a DUI. After a month in jail, he’d left Spokane. Dan had probably threatened him. Dan’s jealousy and anger had been something to behold.

  And yet, somehow, she was still with him. Sort of with him. He refused to stay out of her life on account of Henry, unlike the older kids’ dads. Both Brandon and Scott had vanished into thin air at the first sign of puke, let alone diapers. Good riddance.

  She wanted Dan to stay. Wanted him to be the good guy in her sordid life. Without religion, he’d been a giant step up from previous boyfriends. Now he was so solid it hurt. She couldn’t deal, and she couldn’t get rid of him.

  Dan hoisted Henry to his shoulders as Buddy and Mandy ran ahead to the car. Dixie’d been kind of quiet today, but at least she’d come and been somewhat civil to the Amatos. He snagged her hand and, for once, she didn’t pull away. “Thanks,” he said.

  “For?” Her eyebrows arched as she looked up at him.

  “For making Buddy’s birthday fun.” She shrugged and tried to pull away, but he held tighter. “He’s happy today.”

  “Well, yeah. You spoil him.”

  He chuckled. “It’s not spoiling to go to the park with takeout burgers and a grocery store birthday cake.”

  “You got him a gift.”